One million and two reasons (okay only 25!) why I'm always late!

I'm back! It's been almost a year since I've last blogged. I took some time off because my crazy life did not allow me the time (or mindset) to write any posts! Many times driving in my car I had thoughts of things I'd like to share but when I got home they escaped me. Now that my "baby" doesn't seem like a baby anymore and I'm finally getting some sleep I'm ready to share about my life with my two crazies again. :)

I recently read a blog from a mom who apologized for always rushing her little girl. She realized in the end that she should let the little girl stop and smell the flowers more and stop telling her to hurry up. This made me think about my life. As a person who was usually late before I had kids I find myself chronically late now that there's two more people to get out the door. I am constantly telling Emma to hurry and stop dawdling. The child is the pokeyist kid EVER! I literally have to drag her out the door every day to get anywhere. While I appreciated the kind thoughts behind not rushing your children, in my situation I think it is a necessity or else we'd never go anywhere and we'd never see any of you ever again.

We do end up out the door eventually but like the other mother, we are chronically late. I would say nine out of ten times! So I'd like to explain to my friends, family, teachers, doctors and Cuddle Bugs customers why it is that I can never make it anywhere for you on time..... (and I do sincerely apologize, I try very very hard).

1. I couldn't drag my tired butt out of bed fast enough. On the nights where the kids are up three or four times even seven-thirty in the morning is horrible! I hit the snooze button way too many times and then am running around trying to catch back up. (so #1 not even Emma's fault!)
2. One (or both) children refused to get dressed. Generally it's Emma. She fights me every morning on getting dressed. One day I let her wear two different boots because I was too tired of fighting her to get something (ANYTHING) on! So I said fine, wear two different boots.
3. We can't find a brush. Now we own four plus brushes but God only knows where they all are!
4. Someone called into work and I've spent the morning trying to find someone else to come in and cover so i don't have to rearrange my day to come in.
5. Someone dumped their milk/juice/breakfast on the floor and now I have to clean it up.
6. I'm backed up responding to phone calls, text messages, e-mails and facebook posts and messages from Cuddle Bugs.
7. Someone pooped. It's inevitable. Someone always poops (or has to go potty) after we've gotten shoes and coats on and are walking out the door and for some reason that always tends to be when the toilet clogs. Better yet, we stopped on the way to you because someone had to go potty while on route!
8. We're heading to swimming and I realize that I haven't shaved in two (okay maybe four but who's counting?) weeks!
9. We can't find a hat, glove, shoe, backpack......
10. The indoor cat escaped out the door while I was fighting with someone to exit!
11. That same naughty cat peed, pooped or threw up. I should just leave it but often I rush to clean it up before we go. So gross!
12. "Oh (expletive)! It's our snack day?!" I've been much better at this this year but last year was a disaster.
13. I forgot to feed someone. No, I'm not that bad of the mom on a regular basis, but there has been times when Emma refused to eat breakfast so I went on with the morning and then halfway on the walk to school she says "I'm hungry, you never gave me food this morning." and I said "Oh crap!" and we turn around and walk all the way home for a cereal bar.
14. I've spent ten minutes collecting online coupons and now they won't print.
15. Someones car seat is not installed. Seems this is always the case when I'm rushing. I took one or both out for some reason and waiting until last minute to realize I need to install it. Or I need to uninstall one to fit someone or something else in and I can't get the stupid thing out! Or I need to empty my trunk full of crap out so I can use the third row seat.
    
16. We forgot something after we left and started driving away. Usually it's the dance bag, diaper bag, towel, bathing suit, snack, lunch, wallet....it's always something!
17. We had to stop on the way to the car to see the trucks, pick up a leaf/rock/flower, look at a bug/bird/squirrel.
18. Someone feel down (or probably was pushed) and is now screaming.
19. I need gas or better yet, my car won't start at all!
20. Someone is stuck in their car seat and I can't get them out to actually get into your home/activity. Yes this is seriously true.....Aiden must have poured honey in the buckle of his seat because I could not get him out of the seat today when trying to get to swim lesson!
21. What, they're paving, cleaning, painting the road today???
22. The lovey person in front of me at the store has 2,000 coupons to use today.
23. Oh no, swim/dance/gymnastics starts at 11 not 11:30?? Ooops! Mommy brain!
24. Someone feel asleep in the car and I'm scared to wake them up so I'm driving around in circles for a few more minutes.

25. We're just slow.....no better excuse than that one! It seems to take forever to get dressed, fed, pottyed, dressed again and actually walking out of the door.

 

So I really am sorry that I don't usually make it  on time to to playgroup, work, swimming, school and all of the many other things we do on a weekly basis. If it makes you feel better you can imagine me cleaning up feces or fighting with a screaming, pinching child. It's not that I stopped at Starbucks (I wish!), I just have kids!