Dear House Hunter

A message to the person/people who come to look at my house:

Dear House Hunter,
I am writing to give you a little insight to the way I feel about this whole house selling process and how awful house showings actually are for the seller. I would like to start by telling you that I spent five hours today (and yesterday as soon as I got the call) cleaning my house. Now don't judge me just yet and assume my house is a gross mess and that is why it took so long to get it presentable. You should know that I have two small children, a husband that works twelve hour shifts, and three cats and for all of these reasons it takes an unacceptable amount of time to prepare for your showing.

Here is how the cleaning goes....I put something away, someone takes something else out. I make a bed, two kids jump on it the second I leave the room. I wipe down the counter, someone writes with marker on it. I vacuum the couch and a furry cat sits on it. Therefore, most areas of the house have been cleaned multiple times and still look bad. I once thought about sticking my kids in the basement for a while but as you will soon read, there is no room for them down there. Also, I would like you to know that I do mop the floor although it may not look like it. I just mopped it five days ago when we had the last damn showing and probably four days before that for the one before. If you people could possibly get together and all come at once I would greatly appreciate it. I'm getting rather sick of cleaning!

Now that you know how horrible it has been for me to get the house ready for you I would like you to please abide by the following rules in order to make this a more enjoyable experience for both of us:
First, please do not open any cabinets or look under any beds (I have no idea what's under the couches for that matter, so avoid that area too). This house is full of crap that I do not know where to put and as I hope you have not noticed, there is a major lack of closet space. Therefore, I shove whatever I can in every cabinet I can find and under all of our beds. This really pisses my husband off because he can never find anything after you have left. Second, what I cannot put in a cabinet or beneath a bed goes in the basement, so please don't judge the giant amount of stuff that is down there. In an effort to make it look less crammed my husband has shoved everything towards the walls so maybe you won't notice that we have way too much unused crap down there. Third, if you desire a large yard or a garage please just cancel now and save us both some time. The listing document clearly states that we have no yard and no garage. Why on earth do you think that coming and looking at the place will change that? I'm not building a garage for you and there is no other land available for a yard. On that note, if you prefer to not be near downtown I also am not able to physically move the house itself so please look elsewhere. In addition, the showing instructions state not to let our cats outside. Therefore, if you have an aversion to cats or a severe cat allergy STAY OUT! Why are you doing this to me? If you know you are not able to live here please inform your agent of that and don't book a showing. Finally, in the same category, when you or your agent is leaving feedback on your showing please leave constructive feedback on things I can actually change. Once again I am not physically able to move the home or add more land so telling me that is the reason you won't be putting in an offer really does not help me. Seriously if you tell me you are allergic to cats or you prefer to buy a multi-family home I may have to come find you and punch you. Nice comments like "you did a wonderful job cleaning" are much appreciated.

Thank you so much for coming to see my house. My family really appreciates the fact that my cleaning efficiency is up 200% and our house looks and smells beautiful now. Please make an offer so I never have to clean it again.

Independence

Independence is such a great thing to see in a small child, but sometimes (in my case), it can be hard for the parent! Not only are you realizing that your once baby is no longer a baby, the way they choose to be independent can also be trying on your patience (and OCD issues)!

My sweet Emma has decided that she would like to start dressing herself. This is great! I am so glad that she finds pride in being about to pick out her own clothes and show up in my room fully dressed. It can many days be hard for me though to not comment on her outfit choices. One day she put on a pair of jeans backwards because she wanted to be able to see the rainbows on her back pockets. Another day she insisted on wearing two different boots (she got so many comments about them that day that she decided it was a great success!). Today she came out of her room with a pale pink waffle knit top, bright pink "comfy" pants and purple socks. I once tried to encourage her to wear jeans to school (since we own about ten pairs of beautiful Gymboree jeans) and save the comfy pants for home but unfortunately it was poor planning as I had chosen to wear my yoga pants that day contradicting my jeans speech. Since then I've kept quiet about the comfy pants choices. She also choose to top the outfit off with mittens with the fingers cut off (no clue where those came from!). So I try hard to just go along with it. Can you teach a four year old how to match and not look like a homeless person?

Along with the dressing herself we have been having a lot of "I can do it myself" days. This, I have learned, should be executed by allowing yourself an extra fifteen to twenty minutes (at least) for each daily task. If you read my previous blog about always being late blog would know I don't really have time for the "I can do it myself "phase but I know as a mother I know I need to let her do it. This then leads us to be late for many things.... It's 8:45 and we're racing out of the door to school and she wants to zip herself. Ten minutes later and we're off! "I can read it myself" leads to a five page book lasting twenty minutes. "I can get in the car by myself" results in me standing in the cold for five minutes waiting to buckle her in. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE that fact that she is learning to do so many things by herself and I would NEVER discourage her from doing so. It is just another aspect of mothering I am working hard on, patience (and better time management planning!).

As we navigate childhood together I realize this time is bittersweet. Soon it will be "I can go to bed by myself" and "I want to be by myself" and the cuddles and playtime together will fade away. So I will cherish the few things she does still let me do and sit back and accept the things she would rather do herself. If she looks disheveled and we're late you'll know why!

Thankful

This month many of my friend have shared something they are thankful for each day as a Thanksgiving tradition. I never got the chance to catch up to so I figured I could compile a list of 25 things I’m thankful for just in time for the big day! (these are in no particular order)

1.   My Mom. Not only is she the best mom ever she's an amazing grandma to my two kids. She drives an hour every week to spend the afternoon babysitting them while I work. While she's here she does the dishes, laundry and other household chores and have been left undone. She takes them to their weekly activities, swimming lessons (yes she actually gets in the pool with Aiden!), doctor's appointments and play dates. She takes the time that often I don't have to do one on one activities with them (I attribute Emma's ability to read at four years old mostly to her encouraging her love of books). My children adore her just as much as I do and that means the world to me.

2.    Miss Sherri, our trusted babysitter. She has been the best find ever. She's a retired grandma who is actually our first babysitter's mother. She, just like my mom, is adored by my children. And just like my mom she does many of my household chores, unasked. She's usually available short notice which is another wonderful advantage for busy me who sometimes forgets to plan ahead. We just love her to death and I am soooo thankful we have her.

3.    My husband. Although he may always not realize it and I may not express it enough, I am so thankful for my husband. He is a wonderful partner and superb father. He always tries to put us first and sacrifices a lot of himself to provide for us. My children would not be the smart, independent people they are without him.

4.    My children. Of course, if this list were in any kind of order they would be the number one thing I am thankful for. You really cannot understand unconditional love until you have children. I give everything I have every day for them. Every decision revolves around them. The kisses and hugs I get when I'm gone and arrive home just melt my heart. They are the best thing in the world that has ever happened to me and even when they may not be behaving like angels I love them dearly.

5.    My business. I am so thankful for the job I have. A job that gives me the feeling of true accomplishment while still giving me the freedom to do the things outside of work that I want to do. I have the best of both worlds. A job where I am earning a decent income, being a productive member of society and helping local families save money. While at the same time I am able to be home many days with my family. It's a great mix of my dreams of being a stay at home mom and also my true ambition of being a business woman.

 

6.    Along with my business I am truly thankful for the customers who shop at Cuddle Bugs! Without them I would not have a business. I know many of them on a first name basis now and some of my closest friendships began at the store.

7.    My Cuddle Bugs employees, without who I wouldn't be able to be home with my children so often. They do an amazing job at running the stores when I am gone and it is so reassuring to know that things are running smoothly when I am away.

8.    My dad. Although he is no longer with me I attribute my workmanship and business drive to my dad. I would not even know how to run a business if he had not allowed me to run his business. I know he is looking down on me smiling.

9.    My other family. I have a great extended family. My sister is my best friend.  My  grandmother has us over for dinner monthly! I am lucky to share these wonderful people with my children and have them see what family is really all about.

 

10.  My friends. I have an amazing group of friends. Some that have been my friends for a long time and some that I have recently become close with but it feels like I've known them forever. I still talk to my college roommate at least once every few months and see my best friend from my teenage years as much as possible. I am also so thankful to be friends with so many other mothers who can relate to what I'm going through and will listen and never judge me. I truly feel that every mom needs a group of friends to get together with weekly just to stay grounded!

11.  Wealth. Now don't get me wrong, we are certainly not rolling in money. But we're comfortable. We have enough to be able to support ourselves, own our own home, allow our children to do outside activities, etc. I am thankful that we have what we have. Of course I'd love to be "wealthy" someday, but I am happy with what I have and try my best to give back to those who are not as fortunate as I am.

12.   Health. I am so thankful that my family and I are healthy with no recent diseases or deaths.

 

13. Freedom. I'm proud to be an American and thankful for my freedom. Although I may not always agree with war, I am thankful for those who defend our country and keep us safe.

Ok now that we've gotten through the ones you expected, here are a few that maybe you didn't think to add to your list!

14. Technology. Thank goodness for modern technology. Where on earth would I be without my smart phone?! It keeps me up to date on everything going on, saves me money and allows me to leave my house without having to worry about missing something important. I also love Skype. It keeps up connected to family who live far away! And who would not be thankful for facebook? There are many people I connect with on facebook who I would never interact with if it was not available.

15.  Alcohol. I am thankful that at the end of a tough day there is wine!

16.   Karma. It is nice to know that eventually those who may not be as deserving will get theirs. And I'm pretty sure they do. There have been some people in my life who I am certainly NOT thankful for, but I am thankful that in the end I know their negative actions towards me will come back and bite them in the butt!

17.   Naptime. Oh thank you so much for naptime! The only quiet part of my day. I race through it trying to get as much done as possible before the crazies wake up and need me again! I would be a little more thankful if they made cribs a bit taller so my youngest did not climb out of it during naptime but I'm still thankful that most days he's tired enough to just stay in and sleep!

18.  School, on many different levels. I am thankful that sending Emma to school allows me a few hours of time without her so I can get things done and spend one on one time with Aiden. I am thankful that Emma loves school and is a willing participant. I am thankful for all that school has taught Emma: the little things that maybe I wouldn't have thought to encourage like zipping your own jacket or drinking for a non-sippy cup! I know that in the future I'll be more and more thankful for all that public education has to offer (and I'm sure there will be aspects of school I am not thankful for as well!).

19.  Coffee! Thank goodness there is coffee every morning. Otherwise I might look like a dear in headlights at 8am!

20.  Chocolate. Thank you to whoever invented chocolate and all things which include chocolate. It is my favorite food!

21.  Disney Junior. Thank you Walt Disney for starting the Disney company which now has Disney Junior. At 6am in the morning when Emma comes into my room you are the one saving grace that allows me to sleep one more hour!

22.  Yoga pants. Thank you to the woman who made yoga pants an acceptable form of daily wear. Now if you could please work on sweatpants as the next acceptable fashion statement I would be even more thankful.

23.  The Dishwasher. You fabulous invention! You save me so many hours by washing my dishes for me. If I ever win the lotto I plan on giving every mom a dishwasher, they deserve it! Let's now work on a machine that will load and unload the dishwasher....

24.  Photographs. As I get older I hate to say it but my memory just isn't great anymore. I am very thankful that I have so many photographs to preserve all of the wonderful memories I have and to remember those who are no longer here on earth.

25.  The holidays. This time of year is my absolute favorite because it brings together friends and family to celebrate all that we have to share. I am thankful that someone thought to have a holiday where you look back at all of the things you are thankful for and truly appreciate your life.

 

One million and two reasons (okay only 25!) why I'm always late!

I'm back! It's been almost a year since I've last blogged. I took some time off because my crazy life did not allow me the time (or mindset) to write any posts! Many times driving in my car I had thoughts of things I'd like to share but when I got home they escaped me. Now that my "baby" doesn't seem like a baby anymore and I'm finally getting some sleep I'm ready to share about my life with my two crazies again. :)

I recently read a blog from a mom who apologized for always rushing her little girl. She realized in the end that she should let the little girl stop and smell the flowers more and stop telling her to hurry up. This made me think about my life. As a person who was usually late before I had kids I find myself chronically late now that there's two more people to get out the door. I am constantly telling Emma to hurry and stop dawdling. The child is the pokeyist kid EVER! I literally have to drag her out the door every day to get anywhere. While I appreciated the kind thoughts behind not rushing your children, in my situation I think it is a necessity or else we'd never go anywhere and we'd never see any of you ever again.

We do end up out the door eventually but like the other mother, we are chronically late. I would say nine out of ten times! So I'd like to explain to my friends, family, teachers, doctors and Cuddle Bugs customers why it is that I can never make it anywhere for you on time..... (and I do sincerely apologize, I try very very hard).

1. I couldn't drag my tired butt out of bed fast enough. On the nights where the kids are up three or four times even seven-thirty in the morning is horrible! I hit the snooze button way too many times and then am running around trying to catch back up. (so #1 not even Emma's fault!)
2. One (or both) children refused to get dressed. Generally it's Emma. She fights me every morning on getting dressed. One day I let her wear two different boots because I was too tired of fighting her to get something (ANYTHING) on! So I said fine, wear two different boots.
3. We can't find a brush. Now we own four plus brushes but God only knows where they all are!
4. Someone called into work and I've spent the morning trying to find someone else to come in and cover so i don't have to rearrange my day to come in.
5. Someone dumped their milk/juice/breakfast on the floor and now I have to clean it up.
6. I'm backed up responding to phone calls, text messages, e-mails and facebook posts and messages from Cuddle Bugs.
7. Someone pooped. It's inevitable. Someone always poops (or has to go potty) after we've gotten shoes and coats on and are walking out the door and for some reason that always tends to be when the toilet clogs. Better yet, we stopped on the way to you because someone had to go potty while on route!
8. We're heading to swimming and I realize that I haven't shaved in two (okay maybe four but who's counting?) weeks!
9. We can't find a hat, glove, shoe, backpack......
10. The indoor cat escaped out the door while I was fighting with someone to exit!
11. That same naughty cat peed, pooped or threw up. I should just leave it but often I rush to clean it up before we go. So gross!
12. "Oh (expletive)! It's our snack day?!" I've been much better at this this year but last year was a disaster.
13. I forgot to feed someone. No, I'm not that bad of the mom on a regular basis, but there has been times when Emma refused to eat breakfast so I went on with the morning and then halfway on the walk to school she says "I'm hungry, you never gave me food this morning." and I said "Oh crap!" and we turn around and walk all the way home for a cereal bar.
14. I've spent ten minutes collecting online coupons and now they won't print.
15. Someones car seat is not installed. Seems this is always the case when I'm rushing. I took one or both out for some reason and waiting until last minute to realize I need to install it. Or I need to uninstall one to fit someone or something else in and I can't get the stupid thing out! Or I need to empty my trunk full of crap out so I can use the third row seat.
    
16. We forgot something after we left and started driving away. Usually it's the dance bag, diaper bag, towel, bathing suit, snack, lunch, wallet....it's always something!
17. We had to stop on the way to the car to see the trucks, pick up a leaf/rock/flower, look at a bug/bird/squirrel.
18. Someone feel down (or probably was pushed) and is now screaming.
19. I need gas or better yet, my car won't start at all!
20. Someone is stuck in their car seat and I can't get them out to actually get into your home/activity. Yes this is seriously true.....Aiden must have poured honey in the buckle of his seat because I could not get him out of the seat today when trying to get to swim lesson!
21. What, they're paving, cleaning, painting the road today???
22. The lovey person in front of me at the store has 2,000 coupons to use today.
23. Oh no, swim/dance/gymnastics starts at 11 not 11:30?? Ooops! Mommy brain!
24. Someone feel asleep in the car and I'm scared to wake them up so I'm driving around in circles for a few more minutes.

25. We're just slow.....no better excuse than that one! It seems to take forever to get dressed, fed, pottyed, dressed again and actually walking out of the door.

 

So I really am sorry that I don't usually make it  on time to to playgroup, work, swimming, school and all of the many other things we do on a weekly basis. If it makes you feel better you can imagine me cleaning up feces or fighting with a screaming, pinching child. It's not that I stopped at Starbucks (I wish!), I just have kids!

Happy Holidays

Well the hustle and bustle of the holidays has finally ceased and things are getting back to normal at our house. I can definitely say we have been BUSY!

The beginning of the month started with Emma getting sent to the hospital to get an xray to rule out pneumonia. It just so happened to land on the day I was suppose to bring Aiden down to the gastroenterologist in Albany. The xray was horrible and she screamed the entire time but luckily she was only diagnosted with bronchitis and asthma. We had to reschedule poor Aiden's appointment.

The end of the month finished with me getting the stomach flu just before Christmas. It was also horrible. Being home alone with two active children while you feel like you're dying is just is not at all fun. Aiden spent most of the day trying to pull the ornaments off my tree and open all of the gifts and Emma spent the day pulling Aiden away from the tree, thus making him scream.

The middle of the month was spent with the usual, finding the tree (Emma screaming the whole time), dragging the tree home on top of my tiny jeep, setting up the tree, cleaning up after the tree (because Aiden really enjoyed eating the pine nettles), a few weeks of observing the beautiful tree, and then taking down the tree (Emma screaming because she didn't want the tree to go).

Christmas is my favorite holiday but it sure seemed a lot more enjoyable when the tree just appeared in our living room and disappeared a few weeks later. I do remember helping my mom hang some of the ornaments but the rest of the work was done for us. When you're the parent and the house is your house there are so many more tasks! Hang the lights, hang the ornaments, water the tree, pick up the ornaments daily that have been knocked down by the cats, vaccum around the tree. Oh yes and then there's plug the tree in daily and unplug it nightly (of course we didn't put the plug anywhere easy to access). AND THEN there's take down the tree. No one is ever interested in helping take it down. The ornaments all have to be wrapped up so they don't get broken and then stored someplace safe. Then the tree, all dried out because I didn't water it enough, gets dragged through the house leaving its remnents all over the floor. Then it sits out front of the house so every time I leave or come home I have to hear "Mommy why is Joy (the name Emma gave the tree) outside in the snow? Bring her back in."

Although it was a ton of work and we probably spent way too much money, it was still a fabulous holiday. The kids loved all of their gifts and I loved seeing how happy they were with what I spent hours picking out! I recieved a mommy getaway to Vermont, kid-free, from Alex (can't wait!!). We made some wonderful memories and I couldn't be happier....maybe a fake tree next year....nah....!!