Independence

Independence is such a great thing to see in a small child, but sometimes (in my case), it can be hard for the parent! Not only are you realizing that your once baby is no longer a baby, the way they choose to be independent can also be trying on your patience (and OCD issues)!

My sweet Emma has decided that she would like to start dressing herself. This is great! I am so glad that she finds pride in being about to pick out her own clothes and show up in my room fully dressed. It can many days be hard for me though to not comment on her outfit choices. One day she put on a pair of jeans backwards because she wanted to be able to see the rainbows on her back pockets. Another day she insisted on wearing two different boots (she got so many comments about them that day that she decided it was a great success!). Today she came out of her room with a pale pink waffle knit top, bright pink "comfy" pants and purple socks. I once tried to encourage her to wear jeans to school (since we own about ten pairs of beautiful Gymboree jeans) and save the comfy pants for home but unfortunately it was poor planning as I had chosen to wear my yoga pants that day contradicting my jeans speech. Since then I've kept quiet about the comfy pants choices. She also choose to top the outfit off with mittens with the fingers cut off (no clue where those came from!). So I try hard to just go along with it. Can you teach a four year old how to match and not look like a homeless person?

Along with the dressing herself we have been having a lot of "I can do it myself" days. This, I have learned, should be executed by allowing yourself an extra fifteen to twenty minutes (at least) for each daily task. If you read my previous blog about always being late blog would know I don't really have time for the "I can do it myself "phase but I know as a mother I know I need to let her do it. This then leads us to be late for many things.... It's 8:45 and we're racing out of the door to school and she wants to zip herself. Ten minutes later and we're off! "I can read it myself" leads to a five page book lasting twenty minutes. "I can get in the car by myself" results in me standing in the cold for five minutes waiting to buckle her in. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE that fact that she is learning to do so many things by herself and I would NEVER discourage her from doing so. It is just another aspect of mothering I am working hard on, patience (and better time management planning!).

As we navigate childhood together I realize this time is bittersweet. Soon it will be "I can go to bed by myself" and "I want to be by myself" and the cuddles and playtime together will fade away. So I will cherish the few things she does still let me do and sit back and accept the things she would rather do herself. If she looks disheveled and we're late you'll know why!